Prove it

I'm trying to register with a company called Central Casting on the off chance I may get some work as an 'extra'. An 'extra' is a human prop. Being an extra is an excercise in self-annihilation. So imagine my dismay to find out that in order to be considered to be a 'nobody special' I have to provide a current passport, or driver's license and Social Security Card or birth certificate. Homeland security is cracking down dont' you know. I tell the guy that I have a passport but it's expired. That won't due he says - it has to be current. I tell him it's only ten months out and it does a very good job of proving I am who I say I am. It's a friggin' passport after all isn't it. Is a passport a fraud after it's expiration date? Son of a Bitch! A driver's license is no longer good enough, because the DMV passes the things out to anyone with a pulse. I've no friggin idea what's become of my birht certificate - I was born in 1957. The same goes for my social security card. All this hassle just to get some work being a nobody for eight hours.